To mental health illness

Hello. It’s me. But obviously you know that because you’re with me every single day. I would like to say that I enjoy your company, but it’s ย never nice to see you. I don’t really know how to address you because I despise you with every inch of my being.ย Every day is a constant fight with you, there’s no reasoning. If you want something, you always get your own way. What makes you more powerful than me? Why do you always get to choose?
โ€‹
You came along and ripped my soul into a million pieces and I still don’t understand why. I don’t understand why you have to haunt me and make my life a living hell. I’m a good person, I do good things and I care. I care about others. I listen and I feel deeply. So why did you have to choose to come into my life and destroy me of the person that I was? Is being a good person not enough? Because it seems like the people who have no hearts don’t tend to suffer like me.

I try to embrace you and reason with you but it’s gotten to the point where my patience is wearing extremely thin. You make me physically ill and it feels like you just laugh at me when things get tough. You tell me to give up. You make me feel weird. Why can’t you understand that I’m getting tired of your company?! I’m sick to death of you.

I dont wan’t you in my life anymore, I want you to leave me alone. But you never leave. You never go.

Nobody else can see you. Nobody else knows what you look or sound like. It’s like you have chosen just to destroy me every single day. It’s like you’re playing some sick game and I hate you for that. I hate you for what you’ve made me become.

Please give me a break.

Because i’m getting tired of trying.

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